Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
Corrigan

IF RAPPERS WERE WRESTLERS

11 posts in this topic

http://www.complex.com/blog_galleries/rap-mania-if-wrestlers-were-rappers

RIC FLAIR = JAY-Z

RIC FLAIR SAYS: “To be the man, you gotta beat the man.”

JAY-Z SAYS: “It’s no Biggie, huh, I’m the king now.”

COMPLEX SAYS: Their reigns on the top are as tall as Andre the Giant. Flair was world champion 16 times and Jay has 11 number-one albums. Every time fans say they’re too old to hold their top spots, Jay and Ric show that they still got it. Flair had the biggest retirement in wrestling history in 2008, only to return to the ring a year later. Hov!

HULK HOGAN = 50 CENT

HULK HOGAN SAYS: “What you gonna do when Hulkamania runs wild on you?”

50 CENT SAYS: “This rap sh*t is all f*cked up, what we gonna do now? How we gonna eat man, 50 back in town!”

COMPLEX SAYS: Hogan and Curtis may both go down as the biggest stars ever, with Herculean numbers to back up their reps. They may not be the most technically sound in the ring or on the mic, but charisma and monstrous marketing machines go a long way. Plus, they’re both freakin’ jacked.

THE ROCK = ANDRE 3000

THE ROCK SAYS: “Do you smell what the Rock is cookin?"

ANDRE 3000 SAYS: “Roses really smell like poo poo poo.”

COMPLEX SAYS: They are both considered possibly the best ever at their respective crafts, but the appeal of Hollywood pulled them away while they were still capable of stealing the show. Audiences still clamor for their returns, which look more doubtful with each passing year. Watch Tooth Fairy, and tell me you can’t see Three Stacks rocking a similar tutu.

STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN = 2PAC

STEVE AUSTIN SAYS: “Talk about your Psalms. Talk about your John 3:16. Well Austin 3:16 says I just whipped your ass!”

2PAC SAYS: “Come with me, Hail Mary/Run quick see, what do we have here/Now, do you wanna ride or die/Ladadada, la la la la”

COMPLEX SAYS: The similarity doesn’t stop at their choice of hairstyle and penchant for middle-finger waving. Austin was known and beloved for his loose-cannon persona and the fact you’d never know what he was going to say on any given night. Also, a broken neck forced Austin to leave wrestling long before he should have.

TRIPLE H = SNOOP DOGG

TRIPLE H SAYS: “I am the Game.”

SNOOP DOGG SAYS: “Ain’t nothing but a G thang, baby.”

COMPLEX SAYS: While their initial runs in their younger days were controversial and groundbreaking, HHH and Snoop have since calmed down into family life. They still have an edge: Snoop loves his sticky icky and HHH still points at his nards. And they both are about as consistent as they come.

MACHO MAN RANDY SAVAGE = KANYE WEST

RANDY SAVAGE SAYS: “Snap into a Slim Jim.”

KANYE WEST SAYS: “They pull their cameras out and goddamn he snapped.”

COMPLEX SAYS: When Macho Man first hopped on the scene, he was pretty normal. He was a great wrestler, good talker, and someone with the appeal of a big star and the skill to prove he deserved a top spot. As his fame rose, so did his theatrics. Much like the Yeezy that used to rock Polos but now wears the highest of fashion, Macho Man started rocking shiny robes and scepters, becoming a larger-than-life personality. And let’s not forget their biggest victories of all: the sexy dimepieces on the side.

JOHN CENA = LIL WAYNE

JOHN CENA SAYS: “You can’t see me!”

LIL WAYNE SAYS:: “OK, you’re a goon but what’s a goon to a goblin?”

COMPLEX SAYS:: The new champ is one of the most divisive characters in the WWE. He comes out to a mix of boos and cheers every Monday night. You may think he sucks, but your little brother swears by him. And occasionally he’ll put together a match that makes even the biggest skeptic give props under his breath. And right now, like him or not, he's wearing the crown. Sound familiar?

SHAWN MICHAELS = EMINEM

SHAWN MICHAELS SAYS: “I’m the Icon, the Showstopper, the Main Event.”

EMINEM SAYS: “I’m a f*ckin' cross between Osama, Dahmer, Obama, and Dalai Lama.”

COMPLEX SAYS: For a long time Shawn was considered the best in the business, but had a bad attitude and a foul mouth that kept the censors on their toes. Then, drug problems and a broken back kept him out of wrestling for four whole years. He cleaned himself up, found God, and returned to his top spot in wrestling, outperforming his peers and stealing the show at each Wrestlemania. Wrestlers that have to follow a Shawn Michaels' match probably feel like Yeezy, Weezy, and Drizzy felt after hearing Em’s verse on “Forever.”

UNDERTAKER = SCARFACE

UNDERTAKER SAYS: “Rest. In. Peace.”

SCARFACE SAYS: “I never seen a man cry till’ I saw a man die.”

COMPLEX SAYS: They’ve been in the game for a long time, but have never seemed to lose their mystique or skills. That, and they scare the holy hell out of all of us.

THE MIZ = DRAKE

THE MIZ SAYS: “I’m the Miz and I’m totally awesome!”

DRAKE SAYS: “Last name: Ever. First name: Greatest."

COMPLEX SAYS: Nobody took The Miz seriously when he started wrestling. C’mon, the guy was a drunken, kind of racist douche from The Real World. That’s almost as bad as trying to rap after playing a dorky wheelchair-bound kid in a soap opera. Despite this, The Miz’s skills have gotten him a following and a few secondary championships. He’s primed to be a World Champ sometime in 2010. You can thank him later.

RICKY STEAMBOAT = NAS

RICKY STEAMBOAT SAYS: “There is one champion ready to breathe fire! Ready to scorch your back!”

NAS SAYS:: “I’ll f*ck with your soul like ether.”

COMPLEX SAYS: While Steamboat was never a household name, the people in the wrestling industry consider him one of the greatest. He had possibly the greatest Wrestlemania match ever against Randy Savage, an Illmatic match if you will, but failed to match that greatness at the event again. Steamboat also had an ugly divorce from his wife and former valet. Ric Flair, our Jigga counterpart, also cites Steamboat as his greatest opponent.

THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR = DMX

THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR SAYS: *Snarls*

DMX SAYS: “Arf! Arf!”

COMPLEX SAYS: In '98, DMX was the biggest name in Hip-Hop. In the early '90s, the Ultimate Warrior was just as famous as Hulk Hogan. Do we know what any of them are ever saying? No. But they say it loudly and that’s all that matters.

THE HARDY BOYS = CLIPSE

THE HARDY BOYS SAYS: “We are Team Extreme.”

CLIPSE SAYS:: “Call me subwoofer, 'cause I pump base like that, jack.”

COMPLEX SAYS: These sets of brothers are revolutionary. The Hardys didn’t create high-flying wrestling, but they made it awesome. The Clipse didn’t create coke raps, but they made it the coolest thing since coke itself.

SENSATIONAL SHERRI = NICKI MINAJ

SHERRI SAYS: "You're gonna get on your knees and say 'Sherri, you truly are sensational."

NICKI SAYS: "Let me put this p*ssy on your sideburns."

COMPLEX SAYS: While Sherri’s assets may be lacking in comparison to Nicki’s, both women seem to have the same fashion sense and voice modulation disorder.

HORNSWAGGLE = SOULJA BOY

HORNSWAGGLE SAYS: “Weeeeee.”

SOULJA BOY SAYS: “Yoooooooooou.”

COMPLEX SAYS: You don’t get the appeal, but middle school kids love them and they bring in a ton of money. Hate all you want.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

lol

/

old 50>>>>>>>>>>>>>

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

lol thought that was spot on for a couple people still

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

lmao found this entertaining

the drake/miz one was good

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

KMT

stupid thread but if you are gonna do suttin like this where is Freddie Foxx?

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Complex been riding Jay's d*ck since 1901.

f*ck*ng disgusting.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Complex been riding Jay's d*ck since 1901.

f*ck*ng disgusting.

LOOOL

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0