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Nothing like good old English Racism


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A piece by Oliver "c*nt" Holt

A Manchester United fan asked me the other day if I would consider voting for Nani as Footballer of the Year.

Well, maybe there is a way of saying this more gently but I’m not going to waste time searching for it...

I’d get my back waxed before I voted for Nani.

If it was a choice between him and the beach ball that scored against Liverpool last season, I’d take the beach ball.

If it was vote Nani or watch a box-set of Ian Wright on Live From Studio Five, I’d settle down in front of the TV.

If Ashley Cole said it was either put the cross by the Portuguese or help him with target practice, I’d start running to and fro across the firing range.

You’re getting my drift.

Nani’s not in my top five this season. He’s not even in my top 20.

I don’t like him.

I don’t like the way he plays the game.

I don’t like his puerility, his petulance or his play-acting.

I don’t like his blatant efforts to gain an unfair advantage.

I know that, by some criteria, he has had a fine season for United. He has scored crucial goals. He is a fine dribbler. His game has matured.

But that’s not enough. Not when you behave the way he does. Not when you do what he did against Spurs this season.

Not when you try a delayed dive that could easily have got Younes Kaboul sent off. Not when you then handle the ball as you fall.

And not when you take advantage of confusion between the referee and Spurs goalkeeper Heurelho Gomes to kick the ball into an empty net.

I don’t care which United players were urging him to do it - it is still probably the most glaring example of bad sportsmanship this season.

Nani’s at it all the time. He goes down like he has been shot at the merest excuse. He waves imaginary cards at referees to try to get opponents booked.

And here’s the saddest thing - despite the backflips and the cartwheels when he scores, there is actually very little joy in his game.

He plays with a scowl. He plays with anger. He plays like everyone is against him. It has become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

When he was genuinely hurt by a shocking challenge from Jamie Carragher at Anfield earlier this month, no one believed him at first because of his history.

He had a gash in his leg that put him out for a week but he’s cried wolf so often that when he really was a victim of a bad tackle, people thought he was up to his old tricks again.

Being anti-Nani isn’t an anti-United thing. Not for me anyway.

I wouldn’t vote for Didier Drogba for exactly the same reasons.

And, yes, I accept that England players like Steven Gerrard, Michael Owen and Wayne Rooney have been guilty of winning penalties with dives in the past.

Cristiano Ronaldo did his share of play-acting, too, but I came to appreciate that he was one of the bravest players in our league.

He rode plenty of bad tackles and he took way more punishment than Nani. He was also twice the player that Nani is.

It would be nice to think that Nani will change. That he will come to realise that in order to win wider respect in England, he needs to cut out some of the melodrama.

Until that happens, he’s not in the reckoning for Footballer of the Year as far as I’m concerned.

My vote is going to Scott Parker, for the way he has held West Ham together almost single-handedly as they fight against relegation.

Parker has been an inspiration at Upton Park, playing through injury, even playing against Spurs 10 days ago a few hours after the death of his father. He has been a beacon of excellence in a struggling team.

He has given everything to the cause. He has done it without moaning and without agitating for a move. He exudes class off the pitch and on it.

There are plenty of others for whom you could say the same.

My top five this season are Parker, Luka Modric, Jack Wilshere, Nemanja Vidic and John Terry.

So here’s a tip for Nani. When you play at Upton Park on Saturday, try and stay on your feet for a couple of minutes.

And while you’re there, take a look at how Parker goes about his business.

You never know, you might learn something.

This c*nt is one of the top Journos in this country and has a lot of influence on football (media, written press. FA and prem clubs)

Just says it all tbh

look at his top 5 list....3 cockney boys and 2 eastern block lads SNM

@OllieHoltMirror for those who want it

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Real talk though, there aren't any good black footballers. My man has it spot on.

(He is a massive c*nt faced p*ssy weasel though).

nani isn't good ?

ok lets say he isn't and your right there aren't any good black players

what about north Africans such as Nasri ?

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Guest Lemons

Real talk though, there aren't any good black footballers. My man has it spot on.

(He is a massive c*nt faced p*ssy weasel though).

nani isn't good ?

ok lets say he isn't and your right there aren't any good black players

what about north Africans such as Nasri ?

Nasri looks pretty white to me bro.

I was just being racist for the sake of it in all honesty. I don't like Nani know, he's a cheating little c*nt.

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Would personally replace Terry with Kompany who has been immense.

And the article is unnecessary and shitty journalism and massively unprofessional.

Not racist though. (Xenophobic at most). Collymore would probs write exactly the same thing.

Can't think of many good tabloid sports journos.

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no good black footballers?

as for player of the season goes, its his perogative to put whoever he wants in his top 5

couldnt give a toss tbh,

as for my player of the season. I'd give it to Vidic,

as for the article, not sure theres much to really disagree with,

to quote something that was said about

Cantona, Keane and Ronaldo in the past,

"Yes he may be a c*nt, but he's our c*nt and aslong as he's playing well for us, he's alrite by me"

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Would personally replace Terry with Kompany who has been immense.

And the article is unnecessary and shitty journalism and massively unprofessional.

Not racist though. (Xenophobic at most). Collymore would probs write exactly the same thing.

Can't think of many good tabloid sports journos.

tbh,

all this coupled with the fact that as its an international week, theres not much else to write about,

this will take up column inches and get people talking in the pub and possibly on forums and such things

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Guest Klitschko

Lemons was joking.

+

Nani needs to stop all this though. It's embarrassing.

But obviously the fact this guy felt to drop

Ian Wright, Ashley Cole, and Drogba's names in a derogatory manner into the mix for no reason at all, (yet mention Terry as a performer of the year despite his off the pitch behavior) and his previous history of being a c*nt, it's ssuspect.

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Lemons was joking.

+

Nani needs to stop all this though. It's embarrassing.

But obviously the fact this guy felt to drop

Ian Wright, Ashley Cole, and Drogba's names in a derogatory manner into the mix for no reason at all, (yet mention Terry as a performer of the year despite his off the pitch behavior) and his previous history of being a c*nt, it's ssuspect.

yh i know, the problem was i came into the thread after the 1st 2 posts then went away from the laptop for abit so the sarcasm wasnt comfirmed till after i posted the reply

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Guest Klitschko

Lol very true.

But then the things that distinguishes them, is that those d*ckheads are their audience / probably have those opinions because of said journalism.

if it aint JW, dont f*ck with it.

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just because it is very subtle doesn't mean its not there

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When will people realise that this stuff is mostly reaction based, and is just written to either get peoples backs up, or have people coming out in support saying, "Yeah that Nani's a prick i dont like him either"

successfull journalism if you ask me,

if my guy came out and said Nani is one of the best wide men in world football, and is intergral to Manchester United right now, and is a contender for player of the season,

nobody wouldve batted and eyelid or even commented on it,

my guys doing his job well imo.

he's right, only fans of their respective clubs like Drogba or Nani. and if they went anywhere else they'd be despised by the fans of the clubs they were currently at to,

the 5 Players he named have all had very good seasons, and are also contenders for player of the season,

theres nothing written there that anyone could really vehmently disagree with.

however it will strike a match under a firework which is set to Launch off at SAF next press conference.

i hope he doesn't bite on the bait as easily,

as since his last outburst, he's tried to give the press a wide berth.

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Guest Klitschko

Read his other stuff?

inverting-pyramid-history-football-tactics-jonathan-wilson-paperback-cover-art.jpg

If you haven't this is more than worth it. Slash the footie books thread needs to be ressurected.

He's got Behind the Curtain, and Anatomy of England aswell which are brilliant.

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