Marriage

[Woodpecker]

But does being COMMITED to someone mean being monogomous? Not in my oxford english

[KayGee]

How much does this woman mean to you

[dom dom bullets]

It seems like she values you about as much as a passport. Obviously I don't really know much that's just my guess. Just be careful

[Woodpecker]

I think that a lot of people are assuming everyones values are the same, everyone thinks in the same way. I think that's a very small minded mindset to take on a very broad topic

[KayGee]

If you don't think there is anything wrong with being unfaithful in a relationship then people are always going to struggle with understanding.

It's called cheating for a reason.

[Woodpecker]

Lol, let's just leave it there then

[Michel Kane]

Was talking to some people over the weekend about expectations during marriage.

 

Can most of you see yourselves being sexually active with only 1 partner for 40/50 years?

No.

[Michel Kane]

40-50 years is a lifetime Toney, I think it would be unrealistic to expect a man to do with 1 woman. A man with options anyway. Not impossible, unrealistic.

[Benicio del Toney]

From what I've seen out there most guys get married before they are truly ready.

 

Obviously there are things I am partial to being a man that a woman will never know about her husband, certain things I smh at still.

 

Some of you man will know what I'm talking about.

 

 

1 thing I do know is you have to be ready and by ready I mean lifestyle ready.

 

You can't be going out like you used to and seeing what is out there in it's best form, you gotta live a humble life, a guy has to be ready to live that home life.

 

So many people fooling themselves thinking they can take that lifestyle into marriage and remain monogamous.

 

A guy shouldn't surround himself with temptation and expect to succeed.

 

 

Fresh said not before 40, that is a good age for a man imo, an age where life slows you down automatically.

 

A lot of guys with good intentions shoulda probably waited till then tbh.

[Michel Kane]

Agree 100%

That's why although I understand the process, I discourage young men below 30 from relationships. They don't grasp the idea that you shouldn't commit before or during your peak years. They follow the chronology of a woman's in that aspect (mid-late 20's) not realising they don't align.

[Michel Kane]

Anyone recognise something interesting about where those curves intersect?

The point system along the Y axis, replace that with a percentage system ranging from 1-100. And from that, you define your 'potential' by age. So for example, as a 26 year old male, I'm operating at about 40% of my potential, whilst my female counterpart would be operating at about 90-100% of hers.

Now, going back to where those curves meet, is it a coincidence that as a male starts realising his potential & a female's declines, this is when men are supposed to commit? More & more men need to 'realise' their potential before committing & it starts with a basic understanding of inter-gender dynamics. Sad truth is, people are BLIND to this.

[Benicio del Toney]

lol coaches gone coach.

 

Real talk though, I was fortunate looking back but I always said I couldn't do it again, would have to use a similar tactical system to yours.

 

I was just lucky my mentor was Lippi and she coached me how to look for Craques.

[dom dom bullets]

What do you mean by potential? Of what?

[Michel Kane]

What do you mean by potential? Of what?

Ok, it's going to sound corny but think of the 'game' as a 'sexual marketplace'. Now, what makes men attractive on a FUNDAMENTAL level put simply is a combination of looks, resources/assets & game. For women, youth, beauty, fertility, etc.

The qualities that pertain to men are things that come with time & experience whilst for women, these are qualities they acquire much earlier on.

The problem that too many young men find themselves in, is that they don't maximise their potential whilst developing qualities such as this which is also counter-productive because at least theoretically, the 'better' you are, the better your options which would allow you to pick the 'best' long-term partner available.

[dom dom bullets]

Ok I hear you, but who's really gonna wait till theyre 38 to cash in?

[Michel Kane]

Ok I hear you, but who's really gonna wait till theyre 38 to cash in?

A high value man with options.

[dom dom bullets]

So you meet a chick at 38, a sensible man aint gonna marry until at least 5 years. Fuck having kids at 43 onwards

[Michel Kane]

Why would you:

A. Wait 5 years to marry?

B. Not want children past 43?

[dom dom bullets]

I'd prefer my kids to have a dad. not something between that and a grandad

[Michel Kane]

What's the difference?

[dom dom bullets]

age

[Michel Kane]

So nothing as to the actual parenting skill or experience itself? Hmmm.

Have you considered that, by becoming a man who's fulfilled his potential thus becoming 'better' that could have knock-on effects on his parenting ability & also maybe more crucially, the choice of wife?

Like I suggested earlier, if you're 'better', you have 'better' options to choose from. And if you're choosing a woman to settle down with, than part of that criteria would be her maternal skills right?

You see where I'm going with this

Surely these factors should take precedence over 'age'.

[Mame Biram Diouf]

Age is just a measurement of how long we have been on this earth for in the physical form

 

Depends on how you see life and other factors like what you feel the value of life is

 

I have always been very mature for my age, not just the way I act, but the way I feel, the way I see life, just see it different to people my age, so ''age'' to me doesn't mean much in relation to the whole; ''after 30'' point you was making

 

That whole, ''You have to have various relationships with women to find yourself'' or ''have a variety of frivolous sex with different women'', from my POV now, it is just oppression, we chase women rather than changing the world we live in, we become slaves to our lust for women and sex

 

Imagine we put as much energy and time into life and doing stuff that actually has relevance to the universe rather than chasing women in clubs/road/online etc, imagine how many months maybe even years worth of time we have spent chasing women, it is fucked

 

If you find someone on the same spiritual channel as you with the same views on life, why should you wait another 10 years to get into a serious relationship with them

 

Thats why to me the average thing is bullshit

 

And men who say, ''we have to cheat'', ''we cannot stay with the same woman for 40/50 years'' is just weak and an embodiment of a real lack of self control and compassion

 

Men bow down to this patriarchal oppression of what we have been told makes us men such as cheating and f*cking the most amount of women as possible (just one of the things obviously) 

 

If you found a deeper compassion in life you would be able to fight your desires and the devils fruit.

 

Obviously we have all gone through different things, and followed different peoples words and read different books and studied different texts etc, but for me this is how I feel about it

 

The fact it can be done and has been down, shows that it isn't down by voluntary choice

[Yoshie]

Your graphs aren't going to help you meet a potential wife at 38, that's too late.

Options will be limited by then too.

[Michel Kane]

Why does not being monogamous with 1 woman over 40-50 years make you weak?