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imhim

You Know You Are From London When...

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http://matadornetwork.com/abroad/13-signs-born-raised-london/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1. You believe strongly in the North / South divide.

For you, the North / South divide has nothing to do with the North of England and the South of England. No, no. What you care about is what’s north or south of the river. Whichever side you grew up on has your undivided loyalty, and crossing over to live on the other side is like leaving a religious cult. You must cut all ties, you may never see your loved ones again.

2. You know what the tops of so many bus drivers’ heads look like.

Do you remember getting on a red double-decker and racing to the top to get the front seat with the mirror so you could stare down at the driver? It was possibly the coolest thing ever. You could just stare at the top of their head for hours and hours until it was time to ring the bell (oh joy) and get off at your stop. Riding on the top deck definitely isn’t as fun on the new modern buses.

3. Sirens are like your lullabies.

You know you grew up in London when the sound of sirens can lull you to sleep and the sound of birds keeps you awake. Move to the countryside and those wood pigeons among the silence will drive you crazy. You’ll need to play the theme of The Bill on a loop to cure your insomnia.

4. You walk at the speed of sound.

You can take a Londoner out of the big city, but they will still walk at the speed of sound. Whether in a hurry or not, we walk like getting to our destination in the fastest possible time is our life goal. Look ahead, no eye contact, and go!

5. The Natural History Museum dinosaur left a lasting impression on you.

When you hear the word “dinosaur,” you can’t help but think of the huge dinosaur skeleton in the Natural History Museum. Did every child in London go there on a school trip and marvel at the size of that thing? Looking back I can’t even tell you if it was real, I know I definitely thought it was…anyone?

6. You often respond with “London” when asked what country you’re from.

Oh, is London not a country? Try telling that to Londoners abroad.

 
7. You think people who hate London are just jealous.

Perhaps due to our belief that London is the center of the universe, a lot of non-Londoners like to tell us how much they hate us or our city. We tend to brush it off and dismiss it as jealousy, though. I mean, how could you hate this place?

8. You’ve been woken up at the end of the line.

We all know that moment when you get woken up by the tube driver at the end of the line, about 500 stops away from home, and the last tube has already left. You have to scramble about in some unknown place at 1am for a taxi and pay half your month’s salary for the cabbie to take you back across the river. Oh the shame!

9. You know which side of the escalator is for walking and which is for standing.

It isn’t that hard: Walk on the left, stand on the right. Okay, it’s probably counter-intuitive for everyone else in Europe, but really, please get it right or we will have to pick you up and put you on the correct side. I’ve seen it happen!

10. You’ve been to fewer tourist sites than your friend who came to stay for the weekend.

Well, they’ll always be there won’t they?

11. The Docklands Light Railway scares you.

A tube, that goes overground, with no driver…erm, no thanks. We’ll leave that for the tourists.

12. You are the master of the tube.

You know which end of the platform to stand on to get off right at the station exit. You know which branch of the Northern line to take to change easily to the Victoria Line at Euston. You know how to navigate the new Kings Cross St. Pancras station…. Yes, you are the master of the underground universe. Above ground, however, it’s a totally different story.

13. You know if you left London you could rent a house for the same price you’re paying for your single room in a shared house in the capital, but you’ll never leave.

After all, there’s nowhere in the world you’d rather live. 

-17

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a londoner didnt put that together

 

probably some buckingham c*nt who found work here

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susannahrigg.jpg

 

look at what wrote the list.

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susannahrigg.jpg

 

look at what wrote the list.

I swear goofy people like this need to be banned from london tbh.

 

i bet she lives in st albans or something

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Obviously it's not written by a Londoner

She constantly says 'you' not 'we'

and anyway aint no Londoner got time for...

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a londoner didnt put that together

 

 

lmao@ sirens are your lullabies

 

better than gunshot being ur bedtime story  like some places iv been. sirens would be a reassurance, at least someone's coming.

 

poor poor list

 

 

you know ur from london when most people off ends looks like the result of 5 generations of inbreeding.no offence

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The dlr has no driver?

This is correct.

 

/

 

LOL though, I'm from Notts and I recall that bus driver head thingy. Lots of them aren't even unique.

 

/

 

Final LOL @ the amount of negs Imhim got. 

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Some fuck boy list

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Shall we do our own or is that too neeky for all you super cool studs?

 

I'll start:

 

1. You plan your day around the after-school rush hour if you know you're going to have to use public transport that day

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2. When you can systematically guide yourself through west end/central london (back streets) to get to your destination

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3. you know birds that ur on about in that caucasian girls fred

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4. You can be flat broke and still live a rich life (if you go and look for it)

 

Love this city...

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Define rich life pls, you have left ambiguity in its definition there.

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When you don't wait for the lights to go red before you cross.. Straight frogger game IRL..

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a londoner didnt put that together

 

 

lmao@ sirens are your lullabies

 

better than gunshot being ur bedtime story  like some places iv been. sirens would be a reassurance, at least someone's coming.

 

poor poor list

 

 

you know ur from london when most people off ends looks like the result of 5 generations of inbreeding.no offence

 

the fuk?

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Fuckin list made me.angry as fuck

How can she write such guff that stupid daemon c*nt

That's a list for cunts who hav moved here from the home counties for a 2 year jolly with their south hampton university friends georgie who got a 2 2 in georgraphy and jack some skinnny armed bearded mug who rides an organically sourced fair trade bike

Being a. True Londoner is different for everyone

For me its about being an artful bougeious ethnic hater

Its growing up fighting outside trocodero running from.coppers..China town pissing in them.doorways in Soho goin them stairs we're the prozzies were knoxkin on the door and runninaway age 12... Buying clothes from prohibito back in the day!!.. Riding the tube late 90s ducking robbers and beating up younger kids, park royal zenith ..

its Rubicon with my kebabish .. Its walking around pissed in edgwarr road eating schwarmas wen u were meant Tk be at school..jumpin barriers in di train.. The time we're west London people used to cuss east London and didn't know anything past Camden

Its 5 children in a 1 bedroom flat in elephant and castle in the 50s grandpa driving trucks

Its Mumsy working dead end jobs in the 80s

Its being ethnic and.coming up in di.world without relying on no daemon writing shit house articles for this new breed of.pagan.scum to destroy our once great city

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Define rich life pls, you have left ambiguity in its definition there.

That was the point

 

Rich is subjective...

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