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Beating kids


Guest babatundestacks

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I thought beatings would be a natural progression for me to follow given my childhood.

 

Felt so bad when I gripped up my daughter. Have to leave the smacks to her mother. Even then the smacks are only used as wake up calls.

 

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Definitely last resort business. After she has pushed it to the limit. Refusing commands, shouting in our faces etc etc. She's one of those youts that blacks out & sees red.

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Beatings are for a mother to give imo

Cant be a man and hitting your children

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Last line makes no sense 

 

Can't be teaching a kid not to be physical with others whilst also being physical with them.

 

 

 

Saying you cant teach your child something by not doing it to them is flawed logic and concerning as to me it shows that you may not be able to do whats necessary if the situation depends on it. And I can guarantee, there might be a time and place where your child might need to hold a beating to get back in line

 

However your child will one day look back and appreciate what you have done for them, because sometimes its necessary.

 

Besides its 2 different things

 

We are talking about punishment here, whether it comes in the physical form (beatings) or mental (being reprimanded and sanctioned) they both have the same effect and result although the argument here is that one can be a bit excessive and unnecessary at times.

 

Regardless what ever method or delivery, the end result should be the child should recognise the reason why they are being punished and appreciate the sentiment that if they misbehave and step out of line there will be consequences. And if you are doing it right, the child will understand why.

 

The problem here is that certain parents are not doing it right

 

But most, grow up to appreciate the sentiment and the motive behind it, and end up being well disciplined as teenagers/adults even if they were physically punished, I am one who can vouch considering my own upbringing and my peers around me

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Caught a few beatings as a kid, all of them were deserved. There's nothing wrong with holding a couple licks wen ur acting a c*nt. Best option is a variation of verbal reprimands and smor violence. If my son is really out of line he will defo get some slaps to the legs and back of the head.

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I'm 'for' but to an extent. First off, not in the manner I'd raise my daughter.

 

Second, I could never use the words 'beating', 'fear' or 'harm' to describe any manner of discipline to my child.

 

I understand the viewpoint of being able to articulately apply a principle without the use of contact. However, sometimes the principle is understood but it needs further consequence to be upheld. As someone said before "the final resort for continued behaviour." The ideal is that it never comes to this, of course.

 

I don't think it's a way of raising a child but rather circumstantial. I'd like to hope I never have to smack my son, but I can't say there aren't circumstances where it would be necessary.

 

Here's an example: When I look at my own childhood I didn't get beats for just raising my parents' temper. I was raised the elder of two black boys in the whole neighborhood which set me into physical altercations from the jump. From 6/7 I was allowed to the park across the road to ball and it wasn't long before I had to learn how to defend myself from boys all 12 and up. When a parent came knocking on my door to parade her son's black eye's and bust lip I think the smacks I received in return were appropriate. I learned that I needed a better method of resolving my altercations, and looked to other things like social leverage. You could psychoanalyse and say it's hyprocritical to beat for beats, but I had the sense to be able to associate the consequence with the highest level of discipline. I endeavoured to avoid it throughout my childhood and when I didn't I knew I fucked up. As I matured and became more conscious discipline gradually became verbal and words like "disappointed" became more powerful than the hand.

 

You have to know your child and deal appropriately with the circumstance. The problem begins when pro-contact parents have their own issues, tempers, and the inability to apply the appropriate method of punishment to a circumstance.

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I'm not even addressing the nonsense written above.

 

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Your child should have some sort of fear of their parent so they know not to ever be disrespectful towards you. Supernanny and her 'time out' isn't from my generation. My old man done everything with me and for me and took a keen interest in everything I done growing up, but I knew if I fucked around I'd get licks.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Having my mum say she was disappointed was worse than any beating.

The silent treatment was the killer for me.

This was definitely the worst for me. My dad never hit me, would always speak to me and from then on I wouldn't want to disappoint.

On the other hand, my mum went in all hands blazing didn't really take heed if I'm honest.

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