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Me & My Girl...different cultures dilemma!!!


CAMECHI89

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This is gna be a long story (you have been warned!!) but I would appreciate if I could get help/advice....Well I kinda had a lil madness (argument) with my girl biggrin.gif This was like 2 days ago now and it annoys me coz in these situations her negative thoughts come out!Basically, I'm from a Christian background & shes Muslim, and yeah we ALREADY KNOW things are gna be nuts for us in the long run but you cant help some feelings alie?I can safely say that this is a SERIOUS relationship and I'm sure she would agree :DI've had a couple girlfriends before her but honestly I could say those were nuffin...I'm her 1st PROPER boyfriend (due to her religion I think) and this is both our longest (1yr & 6mnths).Ok....so after our lil argument shes there telling me how "is there any point in this"..."do I think it will last"I laugh in my head and say to her..."yeah why not"...Im just baffled like, coz weve had this discussion b4 when weve argued but those times didnt seem as serious, and I know in due time she is gna have to get married to another Muslim. Could be in like 3/4 years from now!!I'm 18 & shes 19 (Dont watch the age...it took BARE CONVINCING!!...lol)Anyways I know 3/4 years from now is a very long time and we MIGHT not even still be togther by then but like...I wouldnt mind if we were still.Like obviously never say never but I trust her ALOT and I aint gna lie I have mad love for her.Shes a good girl and has no history from what I'm aware off anyway, and she knows how to present herself and my mum loves her off :D (the only girl 2b honest)Shes also telling me how..."she would like to take her religion more seriously...what shes doing is wrong". So I've asked her..."does she still want this...does she still wana be with me?" and shes telling me yeah she does.Boy...I dunno really and I remember we have broken up coz of suttin like this. It werent mad long just like couple hours/day or so (sounds dumb I know).I just dont like thinking is this always gna be on her mind when we argue....so now I'm asking for outside help, what should I do?So what are your thoughts, opinions or views? Thanks...

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ur christain, shes muslim. end ofher fam will neva accept u n shes scared that they'll find out2 b honest wiv u mate, i propa sympathise wiv u, cos ma bredrin was in this position (he was muslim n his gal was sikh).were 2getha 4 4years, on a propa marriage flex n everyfing, but in the end they had 2 break up cos they knew it cudnt go ne further. they was in their 20's n he was f*cked up 4 months, bin a year now n i still fink hes still got feelings 4 her.wateva u choose its gonna b hard 4 both of u. u got 3 choicesbreak up now.see how long it can last b4 u hav 2 break up.stay 2getha thru all the bullshit n get married 4eva n eva

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Ok....so after our lil argument shes there telling me how "is there any point in this"..."do I think it will last"I laugh in my head and say to her..."yeah why not"...Im just baffled like, coz weve had this discussion b4 when weve argued but those times didnt seem as serious, and I know in due time she is gna have to get married to another Muslim. Could be in like 3/4 years from now!!So what are your thoughts, opinions or views? Thanks...
Her saying the first two things that are highlighted, to me, says she wants out but doesn't know how to tell you. Also, the third thing, about her getting married to a muslim in the future, if you know this is gonna happen, why are you wasting your time, precious time that could be spent on someone else you could meet and like just as much as this girl, and have a realistic future with??...
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Yeah ok TREACLE I hear what your sayin but I dont think she wants out to be honest...well not yet anywayAnd like from what I know...she can be open to me...I dont think its a case of how she wouldnt know how todrop it, coz she knows I would understand.Hmm, I dunno man! One thing I live by is never say never...I know its more than likely she will have to marry a Muslimbut is it bad in thinking otherwise? Like you never know what could happen...coz like I met her mum oncebut she thought I was just a friend...the mum questioned me abit (my age, name, how I was...all of that stuff) and I was shocked! I expected a mouthfall...you get me? Thanks anyway.And R-STYLE i get what ur saying too and I know what my choices are but I'm stuck...I dunoo what the hell to do!What would you do?

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Guest Durrty Boi

i dont even know what ur askingyou set out no proper questiondo u want advice on how to keep her?do u want advice on what to do about religion?anyways, seems to me ur wasting ur time n she wants none of itto put it bluntlythe whole muslim/christian thing is all dependant on parents, i know muslim parents who wouldnt mind who their kid is with and others who want nothing but another muslimif u know she's gonan be married to another muslim soon, why bother? its only gonna be harder to get over her in that time

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No no no, I dont want advice on how to keep her coz I'm with her at the mo so that aint a prob.What I'm asking really is what would you do?You know my dilemma as it is but bear in mind some things are easier said than donenevertheless with you lots views and obviously my own I will come to a later decision.And I maybe I phrased some things wrong but this is my 1st ever topic and I am new to this.But anyway when I said my girl will have to marry a Muslim, I didnt mean she would be forced to marry.I merely meant that if she does EVER marry then her family would DEMAND he be Muslim.Her fam have asked her to marry already but she has said no. She aint being forced into nuffin but they believe the younger you marry the better thats all.

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Are you a proper strict christian go church every sunday? or are you just christianbecausemy freinds sister (muslim) married an english guy (christian) but he had to change his religion so now he is a muslimbut then again my freinds family aint proper proper strict muslimsdepends what her family and your are liketo me it sounds like your girl has a point coz she seems to be letting you down gentlyit may be hard to get over it but in the long run its all for the best

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to me it sounds like your girl has a point coz she seems to be letting you down gentlyit may be hard to get over it but in the long run its all for the best
Hmm maybe...thats what everyone who has posted has implied so it might be right but I never thought thator saw it in that way. I just saw it as...We argued, she then got mad, then thinks bad things about me...lolThen thinks whats the point...like I'm sure ppl do or have gone through this when you argue with your partner and you then you think to yourself "I dont need this" and so on.But I'm just gna ask her again soon what does she want or just make the move myself and see whats what.Oh and yeah I aint a proper strict Christian but my mum is...I just have faith and believe certain things you get me?I used to go church on a regs. Not as much anymore were I kick ball.
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what nationality is she?
Shes half Eritrean (if youve ever heard of that country, not many have!) and half Egyptian.But thanks anyway man. I hope things stay cool, like I'm on the phone to her right now...shes bless.I think I might just decide to stick with her for as long as it can last init.On the other hand I'm still open to suggestions.
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what nationality is she?
Shes half Eritrean (if youve ever heard of that country, not many have!) and half Egyptian.But thanks anyway man. I hope things stay cool, like I'm on the phone to her right now...shes bless.I think I might just decide to stick with her for as long as it can last init.On the other hand I'm still open to suggestions.
its YOUR girlEND OF
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there are only TWO people stopping this from workingYOU ANDHER
FACE OFF what exactly do you mean by this? Im baffled...explain for me.
im saying ya spending too much time listening to ya parents who AINT in the relationship and when i say LISTENING i mean letting THEM influence if you two should stay together.way i see it UNLESS its cos one of you are BAD for the other (which it doesnt appear to me) f*ck not doing it cos of religion or family or whatever cos THAT means nothing and even if it does how strict this will be will DETERIORATE as life goes on (do you think YOUR kids will care as much as you do?) bruv just get on with it ya happyshes happyanyone living in great britain that ENFORCES opinions or religion etc on their children ought to not be here ORJUSTGETUSED TOITwhats the worse ya parents can dokick you out BIG DEAL if you and ya girl are tight and its proper tings there are TWO of you MAKE IT WORKnuff said
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im saying ya spending too much time listening to ya parents who AINT in the relationship and when i say LISTENING i mean letting THEM influence if you two should stay together.way i see it UNLESS its cos one of you are BAD for the other (which it doesnt appear to me) f*ck not doing it cos of religion or family or whatever cos THAT means nothing and even if it does how strict this will be will DETERIORATE as life goes on (do you think YOUR kids will care as much as you do?) bruv just get on with it ya happyshes happyanyone living in great britain that ENFORCES opinions or religion etc on their children ought to not be here ORJUSTGETUSED TOITwhats the worse ya parents can dokick you out BIG DEAL if you and ya girl are tight and its proper tings there are TWO of you MAKE IT WORKnuff saidI totally agree with you FACE OFF but it aint me or my family trust me. My Mum loves her to bits (dont live with dad)And thats why I cant let her go just coz of religion and thats why I try hard to pursue that it lasts.On the other hand I dnt want her fam to disown her bcoz of me so I'll leave her to make that crucial decision.From when her Mum didnt blast her when I was caught in her house that time then there is definetly hope alie?Just need to drug the Dad or suttin...lolNah but seriously I'm greatful for all the opinions I have had but ppl dont seem to understand certain things and its like you just got it in one.We are good for each other and she does LOVE me I know that for sure. She just hates it when we argue like who wouldnt?I feel better anyways...so FACE OFF would you say I should go with the flow or ask her again if she wants this just to MAKE SURE?

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tell her exactly what i told youya both big people ya in a relationship and taking off each other clothes etc etcYA NAME BIG PEOPLEtherefore act that way and SHE has to be prepared to tell her parents the cue OR she aint readyi had one chick years ago i was with her for time and ALL NOW her parents had NO IDEA i had a child lolallow secretsallow keeping mallaceallow holding back cos of other peopleJUST DO IT

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tell her exactly what i told youya both big people ya in a relationship and taking off each other clothes etc etcYA NAME BIG PEOPLEtherefore act that way and SHE has to be prepared to tell her parents the cue OR she aint readyi had one chick years ago i was with her for time and ALL NOW her parents had NO IDEA i had a child lolallow secretsallow keeping mallaceallow holding back cos of other peopleJUST DO IT
Yeah ok I hear what your saying. But what if she aint READY? Then what do I do then?Ive asked her before to tell her mum coz I dont think shes that bad but she like " trust me you dont know what shes like"I can only take her word for it alie?Shes mentioned me converting a few times but I told her I didnt beleive it and she insisted she was being honest.I dont see why I should convert though. My mum wouldnt be too happy either, despite her liking my girl and all that.Boy I guess I have to wait till shes ready...cant force her.Does you agree?
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there are only TWO people stopping this from workingYOU ANDHER
Real Talk.My girl got kicked out for choosing me over her dad.Shes Jamaican, Im a mix of things.At the end of the day, you're f*cking her, not her parents. If she hasn't told her parents after a year and a half, and you aint met them more then once (as a friend as well), then shes not serious blad.My bro dated a muslim girl for 8 months, she told her parents nothing. At the end, she was forced to marry, he was dumped, and f*cked up for a month or two.Avoid it. If shes serious, she'll tell her parents, introduce you, and suffer the consequences.Dont be taken for a prick. From time she said "you dont know what shes like/is this worth it?/im letting down my religion", was time she started questioning your meaning in her life.She lost interest. She dont know how to let you down. Blud I beg u dont make the same mistake. Tell her to either tell her parents and introduce, and whatever happens you both bear the consequences, or dont expect the relationship to last. Its just gonna be harder in the long run though.
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