how does a man validate himself as a man?

[MARLO STANSFIELD]

good health and being self sufficient.

[Davicious X]

good health and being self sufficient.

So what mark would you give yourself out of 10 up to this point?Ive got the house, the chick and the job trio but I would only rate myself a 7... But that means that I have something to aim for.

[Grafter]

Nothing wrong with getting validation from others...It becomes a problem when it's the ONLY type of validation you want.

when i say validation as a man/womani mean that something that makes able to say 'boom, yes, i am a man'i asked one man this question, he said: money

I know what you meant, look at my initial response.Like I said, money, respect & getting chicks = validation for most men.

okdo u identify others as chicks

[kurious]

now i understand the question a little more il narrow it down to children, offspring, ur seed and livlihood, ur legacysole/soul/soll purpose 4 existance imo

[Guest Van Der Wavy]

Nothing wrong with getting validation from others...It becomes a problem when it's the ONLY type of validation you want.

when i say validation as a man/womani mean that something that makes able to say 'boom, yes, i am a man'i asked one man this question, he said: money

I know what you meant, look at my initial response.Like I said, money, respect & getting chicks = validation for most men.

okdo u identify others as chicks

Huh? Isn't it self-explanatory (sp.)? Getting chicks = the ability to get an abundance of women you desire.

[MARLO STANSFIELD]

good health and being self sufficient.

So what mark would you give yourself out of 10 up to this point?Ive got the house, the chick and the job trio but I would only rate myself a 7... But that means that I have something to aim for.

put it this way i am the type of person that can OFFER someone a place to stay without asking anyone permission like my parents and im a big man.i am the type of person that can mind my child and other peoplesi am the type of person that can own and maintain and car and other peoplesi am the type of person that has food in his fridge etc etcbasically i am trying to emulate what my parents and my parents parents can offer a safe haven and i do this on my ONES.and im healthy these are the things that matter to me the most without these things i wouldnt care about having anything else cos with these things i can appreciate other things and people MORE.your not much different.

[Guest LOGers]

What makes me feel that im a woman? Knowing that i can cook/clean, have a nuturing nature and that i am educated. I feel that i genuinely know my role as well. I actually want to be a submissive partner. I want my man to take charge.it sounds old fashioned but thats what makes me happy tbh. Knowing that i can fulfill my role.

[Davicious X]

good health and being self sufficient.

So what mark would you give yourself out of 10 up to this point?Ive got the house, the chick and the job trio but I would only rate myself a 7... But that means that I have something to aim for.

put it this way i am the type of person that can OFFER someone a place to stay without asking anyone permission like my parents and im a big man.i am the type of person that can mind my child and other peoplesi am the type of person that can own and maintain and car and other peoplesi am the type of person that has food in his fridge etc etcbasically i am trying to emulate what my parents and my parents parents can offer a safe haven and i do this on my ONES.and im healthy these are the things that matter to me the most without these things i wouldnt care about having anything else cos with these things i can appreciate other things and people MORE.your not much different.

Nods head

[Grafter]

What makes me feel that im a woman? Knowing that i can cook/clean, have a nuturing nature and that i am educated. I feel that i genuinely know my role as well. I actually want to be a submissive partner. I want my man to take charge.it sounds old fashioned but thats what makes me happy tbh. Knowing that i can fulfill my role.

LOGpleasedo you really an truly, in ur heart mean this?

[Guest Batman]

What makes me feel that im a woman? Knowing that i can cook/clean, have a nuturing nature and that i am educated. I feel that i genuinely know my role as well. I actually want to be a submissive partner. I want my man to take charge.it sounds old fashioned but thats what makes me happy tbh. Knowing that i can fulfill my role.

Made me cringe

[kurious]

life roles are usually reinforced throughout childhood learning experiencesi wudnt be suprised if LOG parents had the traditional, husband wife roles and its probs the most appealing way of life for her iv had to grow up with some sick in the face mum that fed her kids on her 1's 90% of the timeso whilst finding a man to help care for me and my fam 50/50 wud be ideal, and a blessing, in reality i KNOWif anything occured to make that not possible at any point in life, i cant let it make me feel any less of a woman, my focus would to hav be 2 show my children that u can still be the epitome of a woman despite watever life chucks at u, i cant let social structures and normalities define me as an idividual that dont make sense 2 mei jus think theres a time and a place for every type of demeanor (?) know when to behave accordingly

[Jo Dark]

Nothing wrong with getting validation from others...It becomes a problem when it's the ONLY type of validation you want.

when i say validation as a man/womani mean that something that makes able to say 'boom, yes, i am a man'i dont mean validation like, if i wear this hat an these creps but they dont colour coordinate but my bredrins tell me i still look fly then its oki asked one man this question, he said: money

I think I get what you mean. Do you mean as in rather than being recognised as an 'adult', the question is more about being recognised as an 'adult man or woman', in terms of gender roles?When it's meant in this way I would agree with Kurious and say a big part of it (for women) is about having children and family and that kind of stuff, although for me having children is not an issue of validation yet (I'm 21), and is probably the same for some others around the same age.

[Guest LOGers]

Made me cringe

lol, hella corny but its real talkmakes me sound like i dont wanna have my own mind but i do, still have personal goals i wanna achieve/am achieving but those validate me as a person, not a womankurious described my upbringing to a t. My dad hated the idea of my mum working even when they didnt really have moneyi have criticisms of their relationship but thats mainly due to my dads arrogant nature, not the actual set up. Smaddy i mean it. Aslong as my partner contributes in all aspects of family life, and hes a reasonable person, what he says goes.tbh i wont allow myself to be taken for some duncebreed or a doormat.im gonna do it my mums way, just better.

[SPEAK NO EVIL]

i see what ur saying LOG but the way you dropped it sounded like u got some next self esteem issues

[Uncle Man]

with poetry

[Guest Batman]

Crying moretime

[Guest LOGers]

Juju my self esteem is at an all time high xtina aguileras beautiful is my personal mantra. ijokehonestly it has taken a bashing in the past but im fine now. i dont see how what im saying makes it seem like i have self esteem issues.

[SLEAZE BALL]

You say you want to be submissive as a partnerBut at the same time you say you dont want to be taken as a doormatOxymoronic tbh

[Guest LOGers]

Not really. Its about getting the balance. I still wanna have a say. If my partner is reasonable dont see why he cant make the final call. Theres a difference between letting someone walk all over you and choosing to be co-d to captain.

[Guest Van Der Wavy]

If you don't know what 'submissive' means within the context of a HEALTHY relationship, no point tryna comprehend it.

[Guest LOGers]

Thankyou.

[Angelo]

When I've achieved something I set out to.I set myself ridiculously high targets most of the time.People around me will tell me what I've done/accomplished etc. But moretime it makes no difference.I only feel REALLY good when I set out and get nothing short of what I wanted.I'm a perfectionist.I think this and feeling validated go hand in hand.Once you feel validated what are you struggling for/working towards?

[Supernova]

Forget the concept of lookin at others to validate me.If on payday all the bills are paid, my woman is happy and I have a measure of control in my life then I can feel a measure of validation within myself, but validation is the wrong word.I would say contented (instead of validated) with the minor achievements like paying the gas bill or the phone bill or that Ive kept my woman happy. And that Im moving to better myself.Validation from others = low self worth

Tbhits SELF esteemthats esteem of ur mother f*ck*ng self

[SLEAZE BALL]

If you don't know what 'submissive' means within the context of a HEALTHY relationship, no point tryna comprehend it.

Thankyou.

Last time any of you were in a healthy relationship was?Its ok...I'll wait...........Fact of the matter is there is no such thing as submissive within the context of a "healthy" relationshipKind of guy that likes their women submissive is the same kind of guy that will slap her about abit to feel validated as being dominant.

[Grafter]

If you don't know what 'submissive' means within the context of a HEALTHY relationship, no point tryna comprehend it.

Thankyou.

Last time any of you were in a healthy relationship was?Its ok...I'll wait...........Fact of the matter is there is no such thing as submissive within the context of a "healthy" relationshipKind of guy that likes their women submissive is the same kind of guy that will slap her about abit to feel validated as being dominant.

co sign