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Does settling for Mr Good Enough make sense?


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Guest Lisa Turtle

O guy. In all honesty I am bricking it. Unless I become a gp (which I do not and have never wanted) the notion of that ideal family life is almost impossible for me.I have spent my whole life striving towards one goal that effectively eclipses all my other goals.Taking a year off work as maternity leave is not practical, my profession is constantly changing. My friends older sister and her husband are both doctors. They have been together since med school - 11 years. They were engaged for about 4/5 years because they didn't have the time to get married. They've both just settled in their specialised fields. So at the age of 32 when does she plan to have children? How will they be brought up, who will look after them? Could I bring a child into that kind of life? No. Because I would want to invest my time and energy into raising a well rounded, confident and aspirational human being.

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O guy. In all honesty I am bricking it. Unless I become a gp (which I do not and have never wanted) the notion of that ideal family life is almost impossible for me.I have spent my whole life striving towards one goal that effectively eclipses all my other goals.Taking a year off work as maternity leave is not practical, my profession is constantly changing. My friends older sister and her husband are both doctors. They have been together since med school - 11 years. They were engaged for about 4/5 years because they didn't have the time to get married. They've both just settled in their specialised fields. So at the age of 32 when does she plan to have children? How will they be brought up, who will look after them? Could I bring a child into that kind of life? No. Because I would want to invest my time and energy into raising a well rounded, confident and aspirational human being.
and thats road only you can cross and decide on.
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You know what I've come to realise a lot over these past few months I can have all the good looking, having girls all over them man I want, but they aren't as nice people as people who aren't necessarily as good looking as them. I'm gonna marry someone with a good personality before I'm with someone who looks good. I tried it with my first ever hot boy/sweet boy recently didn't work, he thought it was some show offy thing. f*ck that. I'm waiting for the personality guy.

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Guest Lisa Turtle

I would never marry a doctor ever. I've always agreed that men + woman aren't equal. But I've been raised with the notion that as a black woman in this day and age I have to overexcel in order to even be concieved as an eqaul candidate to my peers. Under this ideal you spend your whole life so concerned with overachieving that nothing else matters. All I wanted at 18 was to be top 3 selected in my class at uni. Now four years later comes a broadened focus, I'm now aware of other things I want that I wasn't aware of when I applied to university. Only time will tell. All I know is what I've been through this academic year alone means I'm seeing this through and I'll face the consquences of this dream when I graduate and life hits me in the face. I'm still sheltered whilst at uni.

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Guest Lisa Turtle

It is so important not to let life pass you by. I stress that to the younger people in my social circle all the time. Looking back on wasted time/opportunity makes me feel sick.

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I blame history & TV for this change in women.Ok firstly women were subordinated and mistreated that is true, they were seen as 2nd class citizens to men and that was wrong. This attitude towards women is still present in many parts of the world and it is deeply engrained in other cultures, it may never change there. The woman may forever be stuck at home with the child & housework and expected to dote and serve the man.In the UK, a dramatic reversal took place which saw the birth of the "independant woman". I can't put my finger on the catalyst for the rise of this phenomenon but when I find it I'll notify u guys. The woman realised that, after all these years, they were on an equal footing with men and deserved an equal role in society - this is something I co-sign and have no problem with.The problem began to emerge when the independant woman started to become the Goddess, The Queen, The Princess, The Diva etc. This process of uninhibited gassing of the ego combined with an unchaging role in society of the man (we should have been seeing ourselves as Kings and Lords and Conqerors, not dependant on anyone or anyones p*ssy) combined again with the portayal of the woman on TV (I point you towards the infestation of shows which revolve around a "strong" female protagonist) caused every woman, no matter who they were, to believe that they were SUPERIOR to ALL.. to believe that they were an ALTAR for the droves of hungry, desparate and inadequate men to worship at.Men as a whole, we have not helped outselves one bit. Desparate guys who will go through hell and high water just for a little morsel of p*ssy (and there are MILLIONS of you out there) have ruined it for the rest of us. We now have an average girl, who has been worshipped by mugs desparate for piece of p*ssy, who has been gassed up by TV shows, friends, mothers and who now has a falst impression of her true value in our society.The future is a dark one my friends. We, as men, must do all we can to treat ALL women respectfully but also in a realistic manner. Do not degrade yourself for any WOMAN.. retain your integrity and you will be in a position of power.

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interesting read and plenty lols as perclosed-fist backhand :lol:my 2 cents:generally, men have to approach/earn the womentherefore, once they have landed a good one, they appreciate iton the other hand, women usually just get approached and impressed till they are like "yeah"so they dont appreciate a good guy as muchi recon most women that appreciate a 'good guy' who treats them right etc have been f*cked about by 'bad boys' in the past, so know what they want, and appreciate it when they get it

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