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Funny Football Quotes


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Reporter to Newcastle's Shola Ameobi: 'Do you have a nickname?'Ameobi: 'No, not really'Reporter: 'So what does Bobby Robson call you?'Ameobi: 'Carl Cort.'ââ¬ÅI shouldn't really say what I feel, but (Graham) Poll was their best midfielder in the goal. You saw him coming off at half-time and at the end. He smiled so much, he obviously enjoyed that performance.ââ¬Â ââ¬â Neil Warnock, Sheffield United boss, after the referee helps Arsenal score the winner in the cup.Interviewer: 'Would it be fair to describe you as a volatile player?'David Beckham: 'Well, I can play in the centre, on the right and occasionally on the left sideCredit card application form question : 'What is your position at the company?'Jason McAteer's (self-confirmed) response : 'Right back.''My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about 7' - DAVID BECKHAM

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'There is only two teams in mersey side Liverpool and Liverpool reserves''If everton played in my back garden I would close my blinds'*after a member of the backroo staff died* Said this in the ceremony'Look at it on this aspect at least he doesn't need to watch Everton ever again'Bill Shankly was too sickI have more but can't remember them

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"I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest just squandered"George Best."If we played like that every week we wouldn't be so inconsistent"Bryan Robson, Man U, 1990."That's great, tell him he's Pele and get him back on."John Lambie, Partick Thistle manager, when told a concussed striker did not know who he was."I was saying the other day, how often the most vulnerable area, for goalies is between their legs"ANDY GRAY, SkySportRichard Keys : Well Roy, do you think that you'll have to finish above Manchester United to win the league?Roy Evans : You have to finish above everyone to win the league, Richard."If you can't stand the heat in the dressing-room, get out of the kitchen."TERRY VENABLES, Capital Gold"It's now 1-1, an exact reversal of the score on Saturday."(Radio 5 Live)"Football today, it's like a game of chess. It's all about money."(NEWCASTLE UNITED FAN, Radio 5 Live)"I don't believe in luck... but I do believe you need it."ALAN BALL"Merseyside derbies usually last 90 minutes and I'm sure today's won't be any different."TREVOR BROOKING"Dumbarton player Steve McCahill has limped off with a badly cut forehead."TOM FERRIE"And I honestly believe we can go all the way to Wembley...unless somebody knocks us out."DAVE BASSETT"And Arsenal now have plenty of time to dictate the last few seconds."PETER JONES"What makes this game so delightful is that when both teams get the ball they are attacking their opponents goal."JIMMY HILL"Newcastle, of course, unbeaten in their last five wins."BRIAN MOORE"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer."DAVID ACFIELD"What I said to them at half time would be unprintable on the radio"GERRY FRANCIS"John Harkes going to Sheffield, Wednesday"New York Post (1993)"If there weren't such a thing as football, we'd all be frustrated footballers."Mick Lyons"He's one of those footballers whose brains are in his head"Derek Johnstone - BBC TV Scotland (1994)"The crowd think that Todd handled the ball.... they must have seen something that nobody else did"Barry Davies (1975)"I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel"Stuart Pearce (1992)Jimmy Hill: Don't sit on the fence Terry, what chance do you think Germany has got of getting through?Terry Venables: I think it's fifty - fifty

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