Hot yourself up...

[ShowermanSamuel]

We all had no game at one point in time. Life is a learning curve etc.Share some stories of how you bodied yourself to inhumane levels in the pursuit of the opposite sex in times past...I've got content but that can come when others reply.

[Afroman]

very good topic...so whose gonna set the ball roling.

[marlon]

There was a girl back in primary school I really liked.We had an "adventure playground" thing. Which was basically 4 wooden walls painted to look like a house (Norbory Manor for you).I said to her, thinking this was possibly the smoothest thing anyone had ever come up with in the history of chirpsing, "Wanna come back to my place?", and bopped towards the direction of the door, still looking at her.I walked straight into the corner and bash my eye up. She was in stitches. Not really knowing how to deal with that humiliation I punched her in the arm and pushed her over, claiming she was "ugly anyway".

[Cipher]

We all had no game at one point in time. Life is a learning curve etc.Share some stories of how you bodied yourself to inhumane levels in the pursuit of the opposite sex in times past...I've got content but that can come when others reply.

lol@tryna wait till other niggas is bodied then wade through the corpses with your own reply Still, urr, stupidest thing I done was like one girl, but man was tooooooooooooooooo shy to talk to her, lol.Musta went to balham, just me her, and my bredrin, like..me n her was sittin next to eachother, the sturggle for somethign to say was inhuman....then we was walkin down clapham high st, and my bdredin hung back so we could talk, AND I SAID NOTHING, NOTHING FOR THE WHOLE f*ckING TIME. it felt like the longest period of time in my life, ever. Jeezus, it was terrible, so awkawrd, and she knew I liked her too..........she was givin me oppertunities but i was just falling flat on my face...Boy.Epic Thread.

[djbmc]

I'm the club (under 18s) i'd had a drink (glugged a whole bottle of wine before entering) i was young, about 13. I got a mint in my mouth, a girl comes up to me "excuse me do want a kiss?" so i leapt on her and in my pissed state tried to kiss her and keep the mint at the back of my mouth - poor girl i almost drowned her, she pulled away and i went off to smoke my 20th cigarette of the night.

[ShowermanSamuel]

lol@tryna wait till other niggas is bodied then wade through the corpses with your own reply

OK a little warmers... It don't really count cos I don't even think I knew what sex was I was so young, prob about 8, still in primary school.I'm sitting out of PE cos I broke my arm, man was a clumsy yout. This girl called Pandorra is also sitting out, can't even remember why.So we're both on the bench by the playground while the rest of class is doin their lesson...She turns to me, pulls the panites aside and says "take a look at this" and shows me her narni.I think I said something like "Cool" - and that was it. She musta been some messed up 8yr old.I think back on it now and all I can think of is this...

[Cipher]

lol, that is f*cked up.Still, i drysexed a girl when I was in year 3 or 4...but, i digress.Man shoulda poked that.

[teq9]

Took one chick to a comedy club a couple years ago, was bare hot inside and I was wearing like 5 layers with a thick jumper on top, which I didn't want to take off cos it was sick and I wanted to stunt. Started feeling kinda faint... next thing I know I'm lying on the floor of the cloakroom with the chick, cloakroom attendant and a bouncer fanning my face with flyers. Worst thing was we were standing near the front when I fainted so everyone saw (place was full of goons). When we come back out every f*cking comedian had something to say, and man just had to smile and lauggh cos the chick didn't wanna leave (even though I had just collapsed, f*ckeries I know) and she was the one that drove. Worst night of my life

[Kurtis]

i cnt think right nowbut i know ive had some bodied moments, them extra f*cked up ones where u jus wanna teleport somewhere.arrgghhill remember 2moro

[Cipher]

Took one chick to a comedy club a couple years ago, was bare hot inside and I was wearing like 5 layers with a thick jumper on top, which I didn't want to take off cos it was sick and I wanted to stunt. Started feeling kinda faint... next thing I know I'm lying on the floor of the cloakroom with the chick, cloakroom attendant and a bouncer fanning my face with flyers. Worst thing was we were standing near the front when I fainted so everyone saw (place was full of goons). When we come back out every f*cking comedian had something to say, and man just had to smile and lauggh cos the chick didn't wanna leave (even though I had just collapsed, f*ckeries I know) and she was the one that drove. Worst night of my life

[younger_lew]

Took one chick to a comedy club a couple years ago, was bare hot inside and I was wearing like 5 layers with a thick jumper on top, which I didn't want to take off cos it was sick and I wanted to stunt. Started feeling kinda faint... next thing I know I'm lying on the floor of the cloakroom with the chick, cloakroom attendant and a bouncer fanning my face with flyers. Worst thing was we were standing near the front when I fainted so everyone saw (place was full of goons). When we come back out every f*cking comedian had something to say, and man just had to smile and lauggh cos the chick didn't wanna leave (even though I had just collapsed, f*ckeries I know) and she was the one that drove. Worst night of my life

lol sick, she must've been wifey!!otherwise i woulda just bailed!!!

[teq9]

Not wifey but she was a nice girl, plus I didn't have any way of getting home otherwise, was blitz outside. I got a lot of sympathy that night anyway lol

[McLovin' Jones]

I was a late developer still...I remember there was this chick I used to live close to and went primary school with shortly.Stopped seeing her from year 5 all the way up to when I just finished secondary school.Me and the mandem walking in heath when all of a sudden I hear some female voice blaring out my name from a house. She comes out on a her front porche looking PENG. So obviously, my bredrins were impressed.So time goes on, man is calling her non stop, bunning my Mum's credit, calling from PAYPHONE and ting. We agree to meet at her yard one time because she was alone. I go over then there's no answer. I peep in and see movement. I'm like WTF so I go to the payphone across the road and she try tell mans, she with her grandad, and she can't lemme in. I'm not having that so I go up to the yard and as I go in, some next bredda comes and she lets HIM in.PAR 1SAME girl mind. Invites me again. This time her lil' brotha there. We chillin' on the front porch, she tryna explain what happened before. Then, some NEXT bredda turns up. She proceeds to tell me to go in the house with her brother. I'm like whatever so I go in with him whilst next brother spittin' game to the ting. It was an enlightening experience because lil' brother filled me in on what went on in the house and ting. I was actually looking to wife a hoe.PAR 2LMAOMan like me had oceans behind mi ears. The good ol' days...

[McLovin' Jones]

This topic is sick by the way...

[younger_lew]

I'm like whatever so I go in with him whilst next brother spittin' game to the ting. It was an enlightening experience

that line gave me jokeswish i had some stories like this, none spring to mind though

[Cipher]

lol...grandad youknow..

[McLovin' Jones]

Got a few stories still...I'm just waiting for next brothers to contribute.

[Cipher]

Nigs on here think they casanova or some sh*t...COUGH UP.I want to hear Face Offs.

[Gaara]

Not gonna front.My Game came LATEEE.I've messed up more opportunities than a Spurs striker.

[Savant]

Share some stories of how you bodied yourself to inhumane levels in the pursuit of the opposite sex in times past...

That made me crease.OK...CHEIF 1This is the cheif that is definately top 3 selected.Man just started secondary school and I use to take bus home with one yout, proper safe breh we got off at the same stops as well. We had BARE girls from different schools on the bus home but one girl caught my fresh eyes, lets call her "M". She got off the same stop as us as well. My boy clocked me clocking her and was like "I know her we went primary school", I was like "REALLY, I need to talk to her" my balls hadn't dropped these times (no homo) so man sounded like a chipmunk...on helium.Man was OVER SHY these days, I was a very shy child..still am. So another day comes and we are sitting on the bus (top) and I see M getting on and I made a decision that when I see her when I get off I'll "talk" to her. Told my boy I wanna talk to her so he said he'll hook man up.BLUDGetting off the bus now and he was walking down the stairs and I see her and I get amped, he starts talking to her quietly and she looks at me. Off the bus now and she turns to me and I just look at her, these times my boy has left us alone. MAN DID SOME SORT OF STANCE AND SAID "M, will you go out with me ?"......I GOT THE BEST PLAINFACE EVER THEN A SIGH THEN SHE STARTED BREEZINGBREEZING She uppercutted my soul cos went she turned the corner man was still standing there with an absent look on my boat like I just heard Sir Alex was the new manager of Arsenal.Seeing her afterwards was killing me man, didn't see her for time then when I started college she was in one of my classes. These times IT WAS BAIT she knew who I was and we have never spoken about it...ever. BUT no gyalist/player/mack/bachelor can say they aint been parred by a female, if you aint then dont call yourself that. sh*t like that makes you the person you are.Note - The levels are extremely high now like on Anakin Skywalker levels. Ask about me.

[teq9]

I was a late developer still...I remember there was this chick I used to live close to and went primary school with shortly.Stopped seeing her from year 5 all the way up to when I just finished secondary school.Me and the mandem walking in heath when all of a sudden I hear some female voice blaring out my name from a house. She comes out on a her front porche looking PENG. So obviously, my bredrins were impressed.So time goes on, man is calling her non stop, bunning my Mum's credit, calling from PAYPHONE and ting. We agree to meet at her yard one time because she was alone. I go over then there's no answer. I peep in and see movement. I'm like WTF so I go to the payphone across the road and she try tell mans, she with her grandad, and she can't lemme in. I'm not having that so I go up to the yard and as I go in, some next bredda comes and she lets HIM in.PAR 1SAME girl mind. Invites me again. This time her lil' brotha there. We chillin' on the front porch, she tryna explain what happened before. Then, some NEXT bredda turns up. She proceeds to tell me to go in the house with her brother. I'm like whatever so I go in with him whilst next brother spittin' game to the ting. It was an enlightening experience because lil' brother filled me in on what went on in the house and ting. I was actually looking to wife a hoe.PAR 2LMAOMan like me had oceans behind mi ears. The good ol' days...

LMAO what was her name fam?

[McLovin' Jones]

Share some stories of how you bodied yourself to inhumane levels in the pursuit of the opposite sex in times past...

That made me crease.OK...CHEIF 1This is the cheif that is definately top 3 selected.Man just started secondary school and I use to take bus home with one yout, proper safe breh we got off at the same stops as well. We had BARE girls from different schools on the bus home but one girl caught my fresh eyes, lets call her "M". She got off the same stop as us as well. My boy clocked me clocking her and was like "I know her we went primary school", I was like "REALLY, I need to talk to her" my balls hadn't dropped these times (no homo) so man sounded like a chipmunk...on helium.Man was OVER SHY these days, I was a very shy child..still am. So another day comes and we are sitting on the bus (top) and I see M getting on and I made a decision that when I see her when I get off I'll "talk" to her. Told my boy I wanna talk to her so he said he'll hook man up.BLUDGetting off the bus now and he was walking down the stairs and I see her and I get amped, he starts talking to her quietly and she looks at me. Off the bus now and she turns to me and I just look at her, these times my boy has left us alone. MAN DID SOME SORT OF STANCE AND SAID "M, will you go out with me ?"......I GOT THE BEST PLAINFACE EVER THEN A SIGH THEN SHE STARTED BREEZINGBREEZING She uppercutted my soul cos went she turned the corner man was still standing there with an absent look on my boat like I just heard Sir Alex was the new manager of Arsenal.Seeing her afterwards was killing me man, didn't see her for time then when I started college she was in one of my classes. These times IT WAS BAIT she knew who I was and we have never spoken about it...ever. BUT no gyalist/player/mack/bachelor can say they aint been parred by a female, if you aint then dont call yourself that. sh*t like that makes you the person you are.Note - The levels are extremely high now like on Anakin Skywalker levels. Ask about me.

LMAO*e-spuds*

[Cipher]

Share some stories of how you bodied yourself to inhumane levels in the pursuit of the opposite sex in times past...

That made me crease.OK...CHEIF 1This is the cheif that is definately top 3 selected.Man just started secondary school and I use to take bus home with one yout, proper safe breh we got off at the same stops as well. We had BARE girls from different schools on the bus home but one girl caught my fresh eyes, lets call her "M". She got off the same stop as us as well. My boy clocked me clocking her and was like "I know her we went primary school", I was like "REALLY, I need to talk to her" my balls hadn't dropped these times (no homo) so man sounded like a chipmunk...on helium.Man was OVER SHY these days, I was a very shy child..still am. So another day comes and we are sitting on the bus (top) and I see M getting on and I made a decision that when I see her when I get off I'll "talk" to her. Told my boy I wanna talk to her so he said he'll hook man up.BLUDGetting off the bus now and he was walking down the stairs and I see her and I get amped, he starts talking to her quietly and she looks at me. Off the bus now and she turns to me and I just look at her, these times my boy has left us alone. MAN DID SOME SORT OF STANCE AND SAID "M, will you go out with me ?"......I GOT THE BEST PLAINFACE EVER THEN A SIGH THEN SHE STARTED BREEZINGBREEZING She uppercutted my soul cos went she turned the corner man was still standing there with an absent look on my boat like I just heard Sir Alex was the new manager of Arsenal.Seeing her afterwards was killing me man, didn't see her for time then when I started college she was in one of my classes. These times IT WAS BAIT she knew who I was and we have never spoken about it...ever. BUT no gyalist/player/mack/bachelor can say they aint been parred by a female, if you aint then dont call yourself that. sh*t like that makes you the person you are.Note - The levels are extremely high now like on Anakin Skywalker levels. Ask about me.

:D

[McLovin' Jones]

I was a late developer still...I remember there was this chick I used to live close to and went primary school with shortly.Stopped seeing her from year 5 all the way up to when I just finished secondary school.Me and the mandem walking in heath when all of a sudden I hear some female voice blaring out my name from a house. She comes out on a her front porche looking PENG. So obviously, my bredrins were impressed.So time goes on, man is calling her non stop, bunning my Mum's credit, calling from PAYPHONE and ting. We agree to meet at her yard one time because she was alone. I go over then there's no answer. I peep in and see movement. I'm like WTF so I go to the payphone across the road and she try tell mans, she with her grandad, and she can't lemme in. I'm not having that so I go up to the yard and as I go in, some next bredda comes and she lets HIM in.PAR 1SAME girl mind. Invites me again. This time her lil' brotha there. We chillin' on the front porch, she tryna explain what happened before. Then, some NEXT bredda turns up. She proceeds to tell me to go in the house with her brother. I'm like whatever so I go in with him whilst next brother spittin' game to the ting. It was an enlightening experience because lil' brother filled me in on what went on in the house and ting. I was actually looking to wife a hoe.PAR 2LMAOMan like me had oceans behind mi ears. The good ol' days...

LMAO what was her name fam?

Let's call her 'L'.

[teq9]

Another story (no neek). Was going out with one girl Charlotte in Year 6, and when I say going out I mean we stood together at break, I had her house number and sometimes she would let me touch her leg She was top girl at my school and I was so on her it makes me cringe to think about it... she lived in Norbury, I lived in West croydon and I used WALK all the way to hers every morning just so we could get bus to school together (couldn't afford 2 bus journeys lol). She was over rude though, was always in madness with girls and they all hated her. Anyway we were going out for about 2 weeks and then the bitch dumped me for no reason. We didn't speak for time but I found out we were both looking to go to the same secondary school. Around SATS times she rung me, which was surpising because she had never called me even while we were "going out"... My brother answers the phone and shouts out "it's Charlotte for you", so I sprinted down the stairs like Linford Christie lol. She was like "I still like you, can we get back together" and I wanted to scream "Yes!!" but obviously that wouldn't have been acceptable. I said I wasn't sure and then she was like please, I really like you, so I said okay lets do this. There's some long pause, so I'm like "hello?" then I hear this evil laugh and "APRIIIIL FOOOOLS YOU FOOL!" and then the dial tone :D Thankfully she didn't end up going to my school otherwise my rep would be in tatters lol