Grafter Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 mad people love me offonly the other day i got accosted by the guy with the fold up bike in Brixton, has anyone seen this guy?hes new too me but the guys tellin me 'i see you i see u nuff times, but u dont seee me'got off the bus by the townhall waitin for the 37 home round midnight timesguy gets off the 355 i think, starts shoutin at whoever will listen at the bus stop about being kicked off the bus, i see him lookin at me, but im jus lookin in other directions tryin not to get that crucial eye contacthe purposefully walks around to the side im lookin at, comes in my face, looks in my eyes 'U KNO WHAT IM SAYIN SISTREN'im like yh man, hes jus shoutin in my face, spit all on his lip, fold up bike in his handeveryone was larfin at mehis topics of one sided conversation included:his musicpolice comin to his yardgettin a fine for £4 bus fare'they jus wna get me cos they recognise my face, from my music, im the same guy u see on the TV in 2 tousand an 7' i was jus like yh mate yh'ya av a man, ya love him? ya dont love him'hes goin'they dnt wnt me to get on DARK U KNO SISTREN, cos i will kill all a dem bloodclarrt' - he repeated this many many times'i mite have to die, but im takin people down with me'talkin about goin into a car park an shootin up the place, an how he ain lookin to get caught an endless bullshitgot on the same bus as me, sat nex to me, ended up askin me if i had a phone so i said i neverhes like'OK OK, I ASK U FOR UR NUMBER ONCE, U DONT GIVE IT TO ME, IM GNA SEE YOU AGAIN'now i gta be walkin extra alertshare ur encounters with the crazy kind? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corrigan Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 EVERYTIME I GET ON N133 DERE ARE SOME NUTCASESAND BARE TIMES WEN ON THE 118 THIS WOMAN WIT TOURETTES COMES ON AT MITCHAM, SHOUTING ALL SORTS OF OBSCENETIES Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lemons Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Fell asleep at a bus stop one time and got woekn up by a tramp asking me to come back to his so 'He could suck my d*ck and I could suck his'.I got my nut. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corrigan Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Fell asleep at a bus stop one time and got woekn up by a tramp asking me to come back to his so 'He could suck my d*ck and I could suck his'.I got my nut.LOOOOOOOOOOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Risky Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Fell asleep at a bus stop one time and got woekn up by a tramp asking me to come back to his so 'He could suck my d*ck and I could suck his'.I got my nut.LOOOOOOOOOOL :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djbmc Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 my mate attracts these types tbh. one time he was walking along and sum bird hitched her skirt up and pissed at him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Infamous Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 some f*cked up guy screaming 'blaaaadclart' on the 18 from Stonebridge yesterday which was PACKEDwas just in tears Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Infamous Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Fell asleep at a bus stop one time and got woekn up by a tramp asking me to come back to his so 'He could suck my d*ck and I could suck his'.I got my nut.LOOOOOOOOOOL :lol: my mate attracts these types tbh. one time he was walking along and sum bird hitched her skirt up and pissed at him.LMFAO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Furta Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Fell asleep at a bus stop one time and got woekn up by a tramp asking me to come back to his so 'He could suck my d*ck and I could suck his'.I got my nut.LOOOOOOOOOOL :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grafter Posted July 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 my mate attracts these types tbh. one time he was walking along and sum bird hitched her skirt up and pissed at him.LMFAOLOLf*ckin narsty Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Furta Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 remember visitng cambridge and stopping in a park to have a j, when some local nutcase tattoed face etc named spider was telling me how he killed a man with his little finger. apart from that i tend to avoid them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Air Max 90 Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Fell asleep at a bus stop one time and got woekn up by a tramp asking me to come back to his so 'He could suck my d*ck and I could suck his'.I got my nut.LOOOOOOOOOOL :lol: LOL!There's this dirty tramp who's constantly outside White City Station/Westfield. I was in Burger King on Saturday and I see him run in at like 184mph with an empty water bottle in his hand. Ran over to the refillable drink section and filled up the bottle with Sprite, managed to get half a bottle before security clocked him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Martinez Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Other day on the C2C this woman randomly starts throwing upShe then looks around as is apologising to anyone that makes eye contactI try to avoid eye contact, but she manages to catch mestarts saying sorry bare timesI'm like it's coolthen she throws up againthese times i'm thinking reh whats wrong with this ladyso she looks at me again and says sorry againi'm like don't apologise to me but then see that she looks mad illso i ask her if she needs me to call her some help or something, like thinking she's about ti die on the train or somethingthen she's like nar i'm okayanyway after 10 minutesshe's like excuse me, excuse me, and these times the train is mad packedso i look, and she's talking to meand she comes out with the killer"you know how you said you would help me, can you please talk to me, just talk to me please"my boy starts creassing baaaaare loudi can't control it and start bussin up as-wellyous don't even wanna know what happen nextbut yea london is nuts Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corrigan Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Other day on the C2C this woman randomly starts throwing upShe then looks around as is apologising to anyone that makes eye contactI try to avoid eye contact, but she manages to catch mestarts saying sorry bare timesI'm like it's coolthen she throws up againthese times i'm thinking reh whats wrong with this ladyso she looks at me again and says sorry againi'm like don't apologise to me but then see that she looks mad illso i ask her if she needs me to call her some help or something, like thinking she's about ti die on the train or somethingthen she's like nar i'm okayanyway after 10 minutesshe's like excuse me, excuse me, and these times the train is mad packedso i look, and she's talking to meand she comes out with the killer"you know how you said you would help me, can you please talk to me, just talk to me please"my boy starts creassing baaaaare loudi can't control it and start bussin up as-wellyous don't even wanna know what happen nextbut yea london is nuts@ boldedwe do Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grafter Posted July 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 and she comes out with the killer"you know how you said you would help me, can you please talk to me, just talk to me please"deepi think 'mad' people are deep people u know, sometimes when u listen to them theres a msg in all the bolloxi remember havin this debate with a christian on the bus from work yrs back, im tryin to tell him my view point on Jesus an God an that but i couldnt articulate myselfwe get on the bus now, an before we even got to continue the conversation some mad woman starts talkin about what we was talkin about, sayin all the things i wanted to say but couldntbut she spoilt it with interjections of 'an whhhyyyyys that?.....the blue bunny rabbiit, that right, u got it' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djbmc Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 one time sum guy with an accent just like borat's came up to a few of us, we were on our way back form the pub he was like"hey guys! i have three wives, two are virgins. Come to casino with me! *Gives me his credit cards*" Guy wouldn't f*ck off, so i took him to a taxi waiting place, opened a door, threw him in there, gave the cards to the taxi driver and told him to take the guy to the casino. As the taxi drove off the bloke shouted "you are wonderful boy! thank you!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Martinez Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 lol the other day one mad romanian character stopped me as i walked to local tube stationhe was proper clocking me like i wanna talk to you but don't hurt meso i open myself up like you cool matehe goes are you englishi goes yea, my man goes good good perfect, he says you make one phone call i give you 20 poundman pulls out some sick wod, and draws out one notethen goes just ring this number tell them i been arrested for stealing from post office, just pretend you're ringing from police station okeh...he was jokes, took my number and everything for future business but prob got caught by the mobsters he's been tryna bump cos man hasn't called Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tuppatopbrer Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 some f*cked up guy screaming 'blaaaadclart' on the 18 from Stonebridge yesterday which was PACKEDwas just in tears18 has bare memorable moments with the wack jobs.Other day on the C2C this woman randomly starts throwing upShe then looks around as is apologising to anyone that makes eye contactI try to avoid eye contact, but she manages to catch mestarts saying sorry bare timesI'm like it's coolthen she throws up againthese times i'm thinking reh whats wrong with this ladyso she looks at me again and says sorry againi'm like don't apologise to me but then see that she looks mad illso i ask her if she needs me to call her some help or something, like thinking she's about ti die on the train or somethingthen she's like nar i'm okayanyway after 10 minutesshe's like excuse me, excuse me, and these times the train is mad packedso i look, and she's talking to meand she comes out with the killer"you know how you said you would help me, can you please talk to me, just talk to me please"my boy starts creassing baaaaare loudi can't control it and start bussin up as-wellyous don't even wanna know what happen nextbut yea london is nutsviolation? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LuLu Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Early am at the airport today, collectin baggage, some old man comes along trys to get his luggage but it slips through his fingers, he goes skitzo at my friend cos apparently her bag was in the way and then does the triple jump on the baggage escalator thing to rescuse his luggage, then comes back starts shouting in my friends face saying its her fault, walks off and then still is wittering on with himself.was the funniest thing ive seen whilst being so tired, never seen an old man do the triple jump on a baggage escalator before, wish i would of videoed it, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neeko Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 mad recognise mad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grafter Posted July 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 lol the other day one mad romanian character stopped me as i walked to local tube stationhe was proper clocking me like i wanna talk to you but don't hurt meso i open myself up like you cool matehe goes are you englishi goes yea, my man goes good good perfect, he says you make one phone call i give you 20 poundman pulls out some sick wod, and draws out one notethen goes just ring this number tell them i been arrested for stealing from post office, just pretend you're ringing from police station okeh...he was jokes, took my number and everything for future business but prob got caught by the mobsters he's been tryna bump cos man hasn't calledhe may not have been crazy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grafter Posted July 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 mad recognise madwhy i know these people are specialadded to mad people, animals have an over fixation with me, im like eliza thornberryand babies/toddlers, minute they get eye contact with me, its over Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Martinez Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 It's sane to approach random people on street and offer them money for a phone-call? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grafter Posted July 20, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 its a bloody unusual situationdid he have the mad eyes tho?or was he jus talkin easy an normal Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FinalBawse Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 I used to live near one hospital for the bananas.Bus journey home on Friday was fuuucked, I always tried to make sure I sat next to someone but it was a single decker bus.I remember one woman who STUNK, she was a known stinker and she would talk anyone to death. I see her get on, thinking cool, I'm sitting next to someone I'm nice the f*ck*ng man stood up and offered her the seat.Jumped up, flew off. Terrified. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.