Those "When will the ground swallow me up?" moments

[Nola D]

Long story shortSaw one guy I know wearing a suit and said to him "*laughing* RAAAAA look at you in a suit *more laughing*"Then it dawned on me and I remembered that it was the day of a family funeral...wanted to die right there and then

lmao deep

[Lieutenant]

Long story shortSaw one guy I know wearing a suit and said to him "*laughing* RAAAAA look at you in a suit *more laughing*"Then it dawned on me and I remembered that it was the day of a family funeral...wanted to die right there and then

jeez

[Lieutenant]

Workplace took you for some Slosh.

lol THANX! oh remembered another one. was working at envy during christmas & these girls that worked there before i got there were such bitches!! they just thought they owned the place. anyways we were waiting to be let out after closing so we were all standing at the door and this girl the biggest bitch of them was talking to this guy.girl: ..ye i know people don't usually believe i am 16.me: what?! you are 16!girl: yeahme: oh i thought you were older. you look older but then when you open your mouth and start speaking its like ooooh ye she is 16guys: baaa haaa haaa!! shame!!girl: [pissed and screws me nicely]me: oh sorry i just meant you look old but you sound young and i guess you are so... [voice trails away as i continue digging deeper]walked away quickly when the manager finally opened the door. and after that i guess the mood was worse. i hated that place!!!

send me your msnPM stylethanks

[Mizchif]

Spot the Vip2 members.

[Ella]

lmao i always put my foot in my mouth its usually'go suck ur mum''my mums dead''sweardown?'

lol. some girl said this to one boy on the bus, and everyone just went silent all scratching their heads whilst looking in different directions. Then her friend turned to her and was like "his mum died last week you idiot"

[Trilliam]

Long story shortSaw one guy I know wearing a suit and said to him "*laughing* RAAAAA look at you in a suit *more laughing*"Then it dawned on me and I remembered that it was the day of a family funeral...wanted to die right there and then

pissed.went to my last lesson high and f*cked sh*t up for everyone, worst one was some girl sitting next to me who was upset so i said this to her in my red eyed slurred voice as a joke.Me: whats wrongHer: nothin just my dadMe: oh what... dyou feel like he is holding you back from doing the things you want to achieve but you can't rise against him because a) you two have pretty much no emotional connection as it is and 2) your sister left the house so now ur the oldest with all the responsibilities and you feel like no-one ever gives you a breakHer: worst thing was i said it all with a smile on my face cause i thought she would laugh =/ it never came.

[Trilliam]

member of sn1.

[streets.]

lolhuh?huh?LOL!

[Risky]

lmao i always put my foot in my mouth its usually'go suck ur mum''my mums dead''sweardown?'

had that still."ur a c*nt""ur mums a hoe""my mum's been dead for 4 years"...

lmfao..

[kahuna]

i saw 3 sisters i know whos mum died when they were younge, out shopping a few days before mothers day, and i said "oh shopping for mothers day too?"no way of styling it out. i felt so badly

[Arsenal 4 life]

lol this is jokes ..keep it up till morning ..im gone safe

[Kaiser]

some woman wearing a dress my mum was wearing same shoes and everything and the same hijabI saw her from afar waited until she was near me and jumped on hersaid 'hi mum' while my arm was around herwoman turns aroundshe is like arrrrrgh get off mesaid sorry and moved away but everyone on my road thought I was a purse snatcher or suttinfelt like dying

[missBee]

some woman wearing a dress my mum was wearing same shoes and everything and the same hijabI saw her from afar waited until she was near me and jumped on hersaid 'hi mum' while my arm was around herwoman turns aroundshe is like arrrrrgh get off mesaid sorry and moved away but everyone on my road thought I was a purse snatcher or suttinfelt like dying

looooooool!! this actually made me laugh sooooo much!!! aawww bless

[Kaiser]

the worst one was when I was looking for a piss and I was walking home was like a mile left found some bushwas winter and bare dark so I did my business in the bush I'm zippin up and I walk out of bush30 year old ish woman walks alongim zipping my trousers5 ''11 black guy in the pitch black and unzipped= jail timewoman in her prime and me had a stand offshe shouted help!!!!!I said shhhh and ranso bascially from the other story and this one im a sexual predator

[X-T]

some woman wearing a dress my mum was wearing same shoes and everything and the same hijabI saw her from afar waited until she was near me and jumped on hersaid 'hi mum' while my arm was around herwoman turns aroundshe is like arrrrrgh get off mesaid sorry and moved away but everyone on my road thought I was a purse snatcher or suttinfelt like dying

:lol:

[Guest WAVE MACHINE]

the worst one was when I was looking for a piss and I was walking home was like a mile left found some bushwas winter and bare dark so I did my business in the bush I'm zippin up and I walk out of bush30 year old ish woman walks alongim zipping my trousers5 ''11 black guy in the pitch black and unzipped= jail timewoman in her prime and me had a stand offshe shouted help!!!!!I said shhhh and ranso bascially from the other story and this one im a sexual predator

o gosh

[freddie deeb]

the worst one was when I was looking for a piss and I was walking home was like a mile left found some bushwas winter and bare dark so I did my business in the bush I'm zippin up and I walk out of bush30 year old ish woman walks alongim zipping my trousers5 ''11 black guy in the pitch black and unzipped= jail timewoman in her prime and me had a stand offshe shouted help!!!!!I said shhhh and ranso bascially from the other story and this one im a sexual predator

LOLshoulda jus said nah i was pissin dont watch datden jus walked in front of her

[missBee]

another terrible moment. don't believe i had forgotten this one!!!!!went to this catholic boarding school before yea (DON'T ASK)& i remember it was a saturday and we were in the basketball court playing basketball (as you do) anyways.. right next to the basketball courts was the tennis courts and the brothers (as in the catholic brothers) where playing tennis i could not be bothered to head back and change so i was playing in my uniform because we had just come from mass. someone passed the ball to me and i went to jump to get it and the girl from the other team grabbed my top from the back and when i landed all the buttons tore off it and exposed my whole bra and i happened to be facing the tennis court!i just stood there with the ball in my hands, my top all torn open and the brothers quickly turned and pretended nothing happened. it was sooo embarassing!! quickly went back to my room & unfortunately we had to walk through the tennis courts to get out.

[Axiom]

lol @ infamoussuttin like that has happened to me beforewas lookin at this girl for ages comin towards me thinkin is that her then i thought yh it is hergrabbed her arm and she was like what the f*ck are u doin let go of meshe was with a breh aswelli just let go and kept walkinlol @ my memory

[Guest WAVE MACHINE]

i do bare stuff like approachin the wrong person. did it in one rave the other day proper grabbed the guy like its beef (it wasnt) then i was like o sorry.i was drunk. i drink alot.

[Afroman]

One time in the canteen in college I was chattin with my bethrenz about some new ting in the college thats supposed to be loose and this other boy was chillin with us. Apparrently it happened to be his sis and my bethrenz knew.. Then next thing all my bethrenz did the 'ooops ohh sh*t look'.There is me still ranting on about the girl and they started poiting towards the boy, the I clocked and the dude was looking straight at me. Eyes blod shot red. He was close to tears. One of them easy going guys...SSSSSSHHEEEZ!.. I was speechless after. Felt like getting swallowed into the ground.

[Trilliam]

One time in the canteen in college I was chattin with my bethrenz about some new ting in the college thats supposed to be loose and this other boy was chillin with us. Apparrently it happened to be his sis and my bethrenz knew.. Then next thing all my bethrenz did the 'ooops ohh sh*t look'.There is me still ranting on about the girl and they started poiting towards the boy, the I clocked and the dude was looking straight at me. Eyes blod shot red. He was close to tears. One of them easy going guys...SSSSSSHHEEEZ!.. I was speechless after. Felt like getting swallowed into the ground.

LOLwow @ him for not defending the family name but LOL.

[Ego]

i do bare stuff like approachin the wrong person. did it in one rave the other day proper grabbed the guy like its beef (it wasnt) then i was like o sorry.i was drunk. i drink alot.

not a good look mgnot a good onedem "edge a man" drunks alie..

[Guest WAVE MACHINE]

One time in the canteen in college I was chattin with my bethrenz about some new ting in the college thats supposed to be loose and this other boy was chillin with us. Apparrently it happened to be his sis and my bethrenz knew.. Then next thing all my bethrenz did the 'ooops ohh sh*t look'.There is me still ranting on about the girl and they started poiting towards the boy, the I clocked and the dude was looking straight at me. Eyes blod shot red. He was close to tears. One of them easy going guys...SSSSSSHHEEEZ!.. I was speechless after. Felt like getting swallowed into the ground.

LOLwow @ him for not defending the family name but LOL.

innit. some p*ssyat ego, i duno wot edge a man means if its anything similar to dunnin dances then yes theres alot of that. i do it sober but drunk...boy..

[Lieutenant]

lol @ me in southend on saturdayclocked this chick from early that i used to linkbut wern't too sure if it was her coz we made eye contact but she didn't smile or say hi or nuttin(trusay we ended on bad terms doe)anyways comes to the end of the night and i jus bop up to her, put my arm round her and said 'is that how ur going on like u don't no me now?'she said 'but i dont'i was like, 'dont try it chell'she said 'my name is sarah' then brushed my arm off and kept it movingthat was my cue to head back to london